17 Things to Love

Happy Easter everyone! The sun is shining, the birds are singing and Jesus has risen! The power of the resurrection always gives me hope for a better tomorrow and rejuvenates my spirit and soul for the upcoming year.

Maybe that is why I was amused today at this little web diddy.

1. In the South, the word "bulls*it" has three syllables and serves as a verb, noun, adjective and, occasionally, a nickname. (There is alot of b.s. here and we call it like we see it.)

2. In fact, people down south often have charming nicknames- for example- I had three aunts: Chicken, Goat and Pig. (Roundhead, mush, bug eye, turkey...)

Sadly, only Aunt Chicken is left.

3. Down south, everything looks better in camouflage print. (Oh yea!)

4. In the state of North Carolina, it is illegal to use an elephant to plow a field. Couples staying in a hotel must have a room with double beds and they must be at least two feet apart. (Glad I don't live in North Carolina.)

5. For the Southerner, any dish can be improved with a slab of pork. Pork in your greens, pork in your green beans, pork in your Rice Krispies...(The great flavor secret.)

6. Southerners take church very seriously- a Southern church service can easily last five hours- without air-conditioning. We rate the sermons as "rare", "medium" and "well done". (We have evolved...there is airconditioning.)

7. Every part of the pig is edible. Every.Single.Part. The hog foot, the hog tail, the hog maw, the hog grammaw...(I wouldn't call it edible, but we eat it.)

8. The Southern lady is schooled in the art of hairdressing, make-up application, Christian virtue and the loading of various fire-arms. (Absolutely!)

9. Most Southerners scoff at the idea of healthy eating- they eat just what the Lord Jesus himself ate- neckbones and biscuits. (Didn't he?)

10.In Tennesse you can't shoot any game from a moving vehicle- except whales. In Tennessee. Where.there.is.no.ocean.... (Details, details)

11. The Georgia legislature once considered making it illegal for a restaurant to not serve sweet iced tea. (Was that an ethics issue?)

12. I love the way people from Louisiana talk. Can't understand what they're saying, but I love that they're saying it...(A smooth southern drawl can melt any heart.)

13. Tennessee Williams, William Faulkner, Zora Neal Hurston were all southerners. Yankees ain't the only ones what can read and write...(And boy, can they write!)

14. In the state of Georgia, it is illegal to keep a donkey in a bathtub. (But how do you wash him?)

15. In the state of Arkansas, a man may beat his wife, but not more than once a month. (Wouldn't want to spoil her you know.)

16. In Mississippi, it is illegal for a man to be sexually aroused in public. (Are there enough jails in Mississippi to handle this one?)

17. Every Sunday is an occasion for a big dinner, usually consisting of fried chicken, white rice, gravy, collard greens, sweet potatoes, cranberry sauce, green beans, fresh corn, cabbage, potato salad, fatback, fried green tomatoes, macaroni and cheese, cole slaw, hush puppies, fried catfish, biscuits, corn bread, deer meat, tomato preserves, homemade pork rinds- and hey where y'all goin' don't you want no dessert? (Yep, and it just doesn't get any better than that, love Easter dinner down home!)

Smart Growth

As I have mentioned in earlier posts, I live in paradise. For me, paradise not only includes natural wonders but intellectual wonders as well. Our University attracts world class minds, creatives and eccentrics who all find peace and acceptance here on this mountain. Of course, we all sometimes disagree about politics because many of those minds believe in utopias and group think. I am a realist when it comes to these things, I also don't think government involvement is the answer so we butt heads on process all the time. But they also make me think.

Last night I attended a meeting for a group organized to deal with growth on our plateau. Born in the boom times only a year or so back in response to a proposed massive development that would double the size of my little town of 1100, this organization provided a wealth of information to the people who attended the meetings. Greed was everywhere back then, developers were popping up right and left with no regard to infrastructure or process. Our zoning laws were pliable and the public officials were malleable, especially if the right carrot was dangled.

Thankfully, God took care of the issue when we experienced a long drought and Monteagle ran out of water. At the same time, infrastructure mismanagement reared its head and everyone became aware of the sleeping giant called wastewater treatment...or the lack of it. TDEC stepped in with broad and sweeping motions. This was one time I was happy to see them.

One of the biggest problems in the psyche of my locals is the "don't tell me what to do, I am going do whatever the hell I want to" attitude. Let me tell you, I understand and appreciate the sentiment, but unfortunately that attitude has led to some very bad decisions by our public officials and land owners which in turn affects all of us because we pay the price with higher utility rates and pretty major quality of life issues.

Back to the meeting in question. The speaker was Robin Gottfried, a brilliant economics professor at Sewanee. The information he presented wasn't new, I had a crash course in it last year, but his solutions were new to me. Robin put a new spin on government's role in guiding smart growth. The carrot not the hammer theory. Of course, our local government entities have to buy into the smart growth, land use, cluster development premise that have been meticulously and logicaly researched by our University neighbors...but if we can make that happen, the tools that Robin mentioned are wonderfully simple. They incentivize GOOD behavior. Wow, what a concept! Everyone gets what they want thru personal choices. Wow, want a concept!

Hmmmm, sounds to me like I need to get some progressive, fiscally conservative souls elected to local office.